\nI’ve been there, maybe you have too. As a new dad it’s hard to figure out how to be helpful. I’ve got some quick tips that I found useful to well…feel useful. \u00a0A lot of these probably fall into the range of common sense, but everyone does it a little differently. \u00a0I’m sure some folks have ways that I hadn’t considered before too.<\/p>\n
Tip #1:\u00a0 Breast feeding is hard. \u00a0Make it as easy as possible for mom.<\/strong><\/p>\n The takeaway from classes and nurses you’d think it’s this magical natural thing that will just happen. \u00a0I’m sure it was that way for some people, but it wasn’t natural at all for us and it’s very stressful (it’s early on and you’re already like “Baby, just do what I want you to!”. \u00a0Thus I decided my goal was to have Carin focus only on breast feeding for the beginning and I tried to take care of all the other stuff.<\/p>\n Why? \u00a0Let’s break it down. \u00a0Early on in a baby’s life, you’ll find that the doctor primarily wants to know “how much does the baby weigh?” \u00a0They’re supposed to lose weight post birth and gain it back. \u00a0Well how does a baby gain weight? \u00a0It eats. \u00a0Who feeds it? \u00a0Mostly mom. \u00a0If baby isn’t gaining weight back…well…there could be a number of reasons. \u00a0But many moms will take that as direct feedback that they aren’t doing a good job feeding and it’s not a far leap from that to them feeling like they’re a bad mom. \u00a0Dads. \u00a0You don’t want this.<\/strong> \u00a0No one is sleeping well and breast feeding strip mines the body’s nutrients. \u00a0Also there’s postpartum to watch out for. \u00a0Be positive and alleviate other factors which brings me to the following tips.<\/p>\n Tip #2 (Kinda):\u00a0Discuss with your partner and have a clear understanding what night duty looks like.<\/strong><\/p>\n One thing that was difficult to figure out early on was how to handle baby’s night schedule. \u00a0You’re both sleep deprived, if you’ve decided to go the route of breastfeeding (either directly or via pump) that means that mommy is up anyways, paternal leave (if you get it) is usually much shorter than maternity leave which means you have job duties on top of daddy duties. \u00a0 Does it make sense to also be up? \u00a0Cop out answer…it depends. \u00a0Work it out with mom. \u00a0That way everyone knows what to expect. \u00a0I found it useful to wake up and help with the diaper changes and provide moral support early on, but as we settled into “normalcy” I stopped staying up for the night time feeds as much.<\/p>\n Tip #3: Clean the pump and bottles<\/strong><\/p>\n If breast feeding was established it means you’re going to run into the pump at some point. \u00a0These pumps have a ton of small parts that need to stay clean. \u00a0If you’re not using the pump that means you have a ton more bottles to clean…bottles can also have quite a few small parts. \u00a0Help mom. \u00a0Wash the parts. \u00a0Mom may also have a certain way she’d like the stuff washed. \u00a0Just follow her rules on this. \u00a0Carin dislikes washing them and grandma watches P all day so at home I’m the one primarily washing the bottles and pump parts. \u00a0We also have a separate washing and drying rack for these parts. \u00a0I do it that way.<\/p>\n Tip #4: Little things add up<\/strong><\/p>\n You may be noticing a theme, but help out with things when you can. \u00a0Volunteer to: change a diaper, feed him solids, wash the mess after trying to feed him solids, help bathe him, put him to sleep, etc. \u00a0It helps your partner out, but guess what. \u00a0It’s clich\u00e9, but these are the Dad things that you should appreciate while you can.<\/p>\n Tip #5: Give your partner a break<\/strong><\/p>\n If you think being Dad is a full time job, just imagine being Mom. \u00a0I feel like I have to work twice as hard to pull my Dad weight because a lot of the kid stuff just naturally falls with mom. \u00a0Sometimes it’s nice for mom to just have a break without the kid. \u00a0It might be a night out or lunch with friends. \u00a0It might even be as simple as coffee break and some reading. \u00a0We’re all 3 dimensional people, but that can be easy to forget while parenting.<\/p>\n Tip #6: Clean up after the kid<\/strong><\/p>\n Once the kid is a bit older they’ll probably have an area to play in. \u00a0And that place will likely be a mess by the end of the day. \u00a0Help out by cleaning and resetting the area. \u00a0I do believe that consistency and order helps them have certain expectations which makes life easier for everyone. \u00a0Carin is a much more…clean and organized individual than I might be and while we have different philosophies on cleaning (I may have said that cleaning is moving things from A to B…) when it comes to P’s stuff I reset his area.<\/p>\n Disclaimer: I say Mom\/Dad a lot, but the tips are meant to be applicable for all family types. \u00a0I’m writing from my personal experience where Mom\/Dad are the terms we use.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" I’ve been there, maybe you have too. As a new dad it’s hard to figure out how to be helpful. I’ve got some quick tips that I found useful to well…feel useful. \u00a0A lot of these probably fall into the range of common sense, but everyone does it a little differently. \u00a0I’m sure some folks […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[14],"class_list":["post-333","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-dadlife","tag-dadlife"],"yoast_head":"\n
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